365 Days Around The Sun- A Birthday Letter To Myself
I was super hesitant to write this. I wasn't sure if I wanted to share with the world my emo side. But then I remembered, this is what makes me human, this is what makes me relatable to other people across the globe. Here I am removing a layer of myself for you all to know.
Emotional instability, anxiety, insecurities, and self-pity. That describes most of my last 365 days. Unaligned with myself, I hit a place that I had never been to before. Yes, I was a bag lady. It took me some time to realize that. I didn't want to accept it. And all of a sudden all of my poor decisions, whether business or personal, were magnified by my mind. I had a negative voice that lived inside of me and it was quite the challenge to quiet it down.
The past year has been my toughest and simultaneously the most rewarding. For every day that I didn't believe in myself or trust my path, God found a way to remind me. I even started going to a baptist church. And yes, it's very true, when you feel lost God will find you.
But after every storm comes the calm and my storm has passed. My troubles got me deeper into meditation and its been a way to get to know more about myself and my energy. It's been a short friendship thus far, but a very beautiful one. My most memorable day at 25 was meditating on the beach in Coral Gables, Florida. It was a very special night led by Lotus Flower; probably one of the best people that life introduced me to at 25. I never felt so connected to Mother Earth and to my own divinity until that moment. Right there in between land, water and under the moon.
Our birthday is always a time to center ourselves. To reflect on our highest visions and examine our journey. I ask myself things like am I evolving? Am I being the best representation of myself. Am I following my heart? Am I valuing my intuition? What did I learn the most? What will I bring with me in this new year. Ar-Yoga says that our birthday is the day to rededicate ourselves to the real in us, with renewed vigour and renewed commitment. So on the eve of my birthday I decided to write a letter to myself and share it with the universe.
I've seen you triumph, I've seen you fall. I've seen you on your best days, and your worst days. I've listened to your concerns, your complaints, your goals, your heart, your spirit. I know that you don't have all the answers at this moment and that you're still searching and defining your real purpose. But just believe in yourself. Believe in your ability to touch people, to influence, to lead.
Trust your intuition, listen to it. Don't ignore it like you've done in your past. The love that you give will come back to you, so don't change who you are. Don't let the negative things of this world block you from seeing all the beauty. More importantly YOUR beauty.
You've claimed to be a lioness, so start acting like one. Make 26 an opportunity for you to show all that you've prepared for in the last two decades and a half. Always remember that the mastery of self starts with self-discipline, self-awareness and self-love. You don't know all of the power that you have yet and I only hope that you can identify all of your power points and untapped capabilities in this new year. As the sun rises on your 26th birthday, remember that you aren't defined by your past and that the best version of you is yet to come.
Your heart and soul.