10 Tips for the Passionless Student



Why are you in school? Is it to meet pretty girls and handsome guys? Are you a serious and passionate student with the drive to grow and prosper through education? Maybe you just like to party, need more of a social following or your parents are threatening to throw you out of the house. Whatever the situation is, know that it is OK to not know why! Yes, I know that commuting to school costs a fortune and you would rather be contemplating the meaning of life in your underwear. I completely understand that working 20 hours or more in a week is placed in investment towards your daily caffeine intake. I understand your hatred towards the oblivious morons who should have stood in high school when the professor says the word "sex" in Gender Studies and the buffoons behind you are making immature comments from lack of sexual experience. I feel your pain my dear babies. I am here to tell you that you need to survive in college, and you will. College can make or break you and here is your survival guide:
  1. You need to sleep. Your young developing body can only take so much and students from the ages of 18 to 25 need at least 7 hours of sleep for various(and obvious) health reasons.
  2. Cup of coffee a day keeps insanity away.
  3. Study! Study. Party in between. Study and more study. Seriously, studying is a detrimental part of a college and it gets harder because it requires that you invest some type of commitment to memorization. If being crucified is better than cracking open a book, at least five minutes before you go to sleep and five minutes in the morning a day will help.
  4. Get involved. Meet people who are interested in the things you are interested in. Who says there isn't someone in the world who shares your passion for Mayonnaise-inspired art or your love for dissecting Jellyfish? There is someone out there for you, you could even start your own club!
  5. Do your research on student discounts, they are everywhere. I cannot tell you how much money I have saved by simply googling student discounts for bus passes, books on Amazon or even a cup of coffee.
  6. 6. Tell Mama Bear you love her and appreciate her. Seeing you grow up into a reckless, ungrateful son of a bastard of an adult opens up her heart because her little-wittle baby is not a baby anymore (I think this is what they call "love").
  7. Start saving your hard-earned, grocery-cashier job cash so you have money to escape to France to become a Pop-Rock superstar upon graduation.
  8. Between work and school, remember that you are not running on alkaline batteries and give yourself time to relax and have fun. Just don't be that girl who comes into 8am class with a skin-tight leopard dress with vomit stains from last night.
  9.  College is more than just getting a degree. It is about finding yourself and where you belong. Take time out to date yourself, learn about yourself, figure out what you like or do not like. Remember to fall in and out of love with yourself on this journey to meeting you.
  10. Call me or Ghislaine and we will happily put on our capes and wrestle your professors for you in exchange for hair products, eccentric wedges or lovely Lush make-up (nothing in life is free).
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